LIFE SUPPLEMENT
Sunday, October 13, 2013
God’s Greatest Gift : “Freewill”
Life is like driving a car. We
can go everywhere we want to and always have the choice whether we will go by
the rules or not. Of course, there will be consequences if we choose to break
the rules on the road, but isn’t life also all about dealing with consequences?
The important thing is that the freedom to decide and to choose have always
been on our hand since the beginning whether we realize it or not. Sometimes,
when the traffic light turned red we feel like there is no other choice other
than to stop. Or may be, when we stuck in traffic jam it seems like there is no
other way other than wait for it to unravel. This is called a boundary. For
sure, everybody have a boundary in their life. A solid brick wall that we feel
impossible to break through. But, life boundaries are different than the real
brick wall. Instead of being grounded in a solid foundation, life boundaries
are planned in our mind. What we often forget is that this boundaries can
extent to unlimited distance. The question is on how much efforts have we put
to push this imaginary wall.
The
freedom to choose and decide can not be taken from our hands, unless we give it
up. We can wish and dreams almost about everything in ourlife, and the freedom
to bring it into reality have always been ours. This is called free-will. With
this God’s greatest gift, we can almost do and achieve anything in life,
limited to what boundaries we have in mind. When we bumped into problems or confused in an intersection, we
are actually being tested whether we will still have a strong hold onto our
believe or let those problems lead us astray. Every problem and consequences we
have today is the result of yesterday’s decision. But, that does not mean that
we have made a wrong decision or taking a wrong turn at that intersection.
There is no right or wrong in making a decision. There is only harder and easier
path to cross or shorter and longer road to travel. Either way takes us into
the same destination. Be eager to make a choice, because it has never been too
late.
Friday, October 11, 2013
The Art of Moving On : The First Step
Words are the most complicated things in the
world. With a little magic known
as“rephrase”, it will
reveal a secret that anchored
way too deep for anyone to see or to understand. A person may say a lot of
things but actually share nothing, as well as someone that have a few words to
say but filled with valuable meanings. “what” and “if” into “what if”, a word
that can haunt someone for the rest of their life or the word “move” and “on”
into “move on”, one of the hardest things to do in life.
Standing
alone, the word “move” might sounds familiar and natural for anyone to be able
to do. An addition of another word will reveals how tricky it may get. Someone commonly
feels the necessity to
move on right after something bad or tragic happen. The deffinition of bad or
tragic can varies from breaking up with girlfriend or boyfriend, failing in
career, until the extent of loosing someone we hold dear. The difference in
interpretation itself is not the issue as all come from the believe that
everyone must continue with their life at some point and grab every good
opportunities for a better life in the future.
Did,
I say a better life? Yes, like it or not the ability to move on is related to
happiness itself. Happiness is the best parameter to measure the quality of
life. It is very relative depends on the person who become the subject, and that
is why I call it best. Human is a very unique and distinct creature from one
and another, so it is only right to also use the most unique and distinct
parameter to measure the quality of someone’s life.
Why
is it hard to move on? Moving on means not only that we accept what has happen
to us but also letting it go as it is. It is simply hard because the truth or
facts are not always fun to be known as well as to be accepted. The first rule
about moving on is that, regardless how hard it is, no one have the rights to
tell other people when is the right time to move on. Forgetting what happen in
the past is easy but to completely overcome the guilt, anger, or hatred that it
caused is something else. And to do that, someone must decide by it’s consience
call. Only then he/she will know when is the right time to forget, forgive and emerge
as a stronger individual.
Some
may choose to escape and some are struggling to overcome a bitter experience.
If you watch movies a lot, you may think think that escape from the past is
always identical as being a coward. Well, you are not wrong but not necessarily
right either. Depends on how your self-translation give meaning toward “escape”.
Going somewhere far, put some distance and starting a new life can be an
effective way. It is quiet suggested to be honest, as long as the main intention
is purely to recover and forget the unbearable past. Be sure we have
already paid all debt and responsibility that turn out to be ours. Not escaping
from a responsibility after what we have done. Bussiness is bussiness, so does
responsibility. It haunts like a ghost driven by an unfinished bussiness.
Therefore, the intention to move on is just like a dry leaves blown by
shivering early spring wind. It will be hard to grab. Even so, it is still
best to overcome what happen and continue life as it was before. Meaning that
you are bold enough to take a strong stance that those happening will not make
a burden for you. Or if it is, then you prove that you are strong enough to
bear that. Those life-dumbell will make your heart even stronger as you are
trained to take steps everyday carrying those on your shoulder.
Forcing
ourself to move on too fast is like pointing a gun in front of our face. We can
hold it for a while, but eventually we are only waiting when it will go off
again. There are a lot of people who feel like they can’t even understand
themself. So, it is least wise for other people to act like knowing everything
about a person. The best can be done after all is trying to care and
understand. Moving on is indeed important to be done, but for that take your
time to feel, reflect, learn, and decide when is the right time to take one
step ahead.
Life
is like running in a repeated track. It is not solely on the matter of how
you rush yourself toward the finish line. What matter is that you can actually
make it to the finish line and be prepared to step forward onto the next lap. Humans
heart is fragile from the beginning. How to make it stronger, we decide. And in
every decision, it is always best to think over it first before taking any
action, because some things just do not have undo button. So, take your time
and use it with wisdom.
What Is It Mean To Be “Me”?
Every single day that we are
living in is always meant for something to happen, for better or worse, whether
we wish for it or not. Tons of experiences and never-be-forgotten happenings
makes our life more colorful regardless of which color have been put into
drawings by those life experiences. It can been bright colors that make our
life more fun, cheerful and make our heart more settle or the vice versa,
less-bright colors that make life seems so gloomy, but not less filled with the
learning of wisdom. Each color with no doubt contributes to what we have become
today.
As
life can be described as a never-ending experience, so does the learning
process itself that will determine who we are going to be in the future and
what characters will be drawn in our self-canvas. This process have taken place
and still taking place in everybody’s life crossing the boundary of age. This,
of course have mostlikely shattered the common believe that only teenagers and
youths that are dwelling with the process of finding their true identity. The
difference between youths and the elder is on the way they deal with every
happening they cross by in life. The elder with more wisdoms and more
experiences they have been through, can be wiser, calmer and see things from a
wider perspective. Means that they are not so eagerly to judge something as
right or wrong, bad or good and can see better through the meaning of a
happening. Meanwhile, younger people might be more eager in giving judgement
and more emotional in dealing with things. But some extraordinary people can give no less widom than
the elder since they are very young. Because since young age, they have aleady
knew what to do and who to become.
Now we have
finally understand why it is so important to recognize who we really are and
what it means to be ourself. A grasp of understanding about what kind of person
we want to be in the future, will give us a life guidance in the process of our
character’s formation. Because with so many different experiences and problems
we are going to face and the new point of view that will be brought by them,
there is no warranty that it will shape us into a better person as we are all
hoping. In some cases, it makes us forget who we are, and turns us into someone
else or worse, into someone we never wish to become.
First
of all, being ourself means that we are being honest to other people as well as
our self about our true character. When we are able to put aside the need to
put a mask to be someone else so that other people will think about us the way
we want them to think. This necessities was born out of the desire to be liked
by others, admired or a simple making impression purpose. In fact, other people
rarely fancying to be close with a person of such character. Let’s look deeper
why. When people put a mask to cover their true self, what they did was
amplifying their fear to reveal their true identity. So, in every interaction, conversation
or chit chat with other people, we can notice that this kind of person never
actually share anything about themselves. Further interaction will show that
their actions are often not consistant with their words. Person of such
characters hardly can be trusted by other people because others feel like they
don’t really know anything about this person and whether or not such person can
be trusted with something important or private matters. So, readers can see how
a person that try to impress others by being someone else end up to be a person
that actually impress no one and lonely in life. But, it doesn’t mean that this
kind of person is actually bad in personalities. It is only that they are
trying to cover their inconfidence of what they thought to be their weaknesses.
They want to be seen strong and just as stand out as the others. Their wants is
no less noble, that they want to please others and make other people to like
them. As human that share life with other people, we should help this kind of
person by willingly become their friends, share love and friendship that they
are craving so badly, and show them that there will always be people who will
gladly accept them for whoever they are. We should never treat them with hatred,
for enough hatred have already filled their heart. Life is so much fun and no
one have to feel alone.
Second
of all, being ourself does not simply means that we stick only to a single
believe about what is the right thing to do or how to deal with problems in our
personal way. It means that we are brave enough to do what our consience tells
us to do as we consider those things are right. Other people may forbid us to
do what we judge to be right or leading us astray, but if we are to be truly
being ourself then it is our heart that will lead our action regardless of what
people say. This is called as having principles in life. Every people have
their own parameter to identify what is right and wrong, and their own
consideration to see beyond a certain problem to determine which action will
bring better result and minimize harm. Thus, the parameter varies in each
individuals. In other words, we may say that every person actually have
principles of their own, even the most faint-hearted person. The difference
will be on how much courage does one hold to follow those principles. When we
decide that we will not smoke for example, or that we will always treat people
with kindness, become a good brother or sister, stay away from corruptions at
work, those are when we are said to have principles. In a lot of different
circumtances, we are tested. When we are overruled by anger and hatred or a
simple bad mood problem, can we still smile at other people and treat them with
kindness? When our need of money is dire and we are offered such an easy way
out, will we let our path to bend to a malicious will? Only by believing that
we are strong enough to follow our noble principles eventhough it means that we
will have to take a harder different paths than other people, we will be able
pass the test. “Be proud To be Different!”
The third and
the hardest thing about being ourself is on how we are brave enough to
acknowledge every mistake that we make and from there, looking forward to
change. As life is very dynamic and everyday we learn about something new, it
is mostlikely that as we go on with our life we will also find some new truths
in our journey. The development of science is best to give an example about
this new truths. How we believe five hundreds years ago that the earth was the center
of the universe and the sun was revoluting arround it have been proven wrong by
Galileo Galilei with his telescope. It is just an example to explain that as
humans are advancing into the future, they will learn a lot of new things and
from it finally find the truth that they are seeking. But it is the willingness
of humans to acknowledge their mistakes in the past that make them able to
really accept the truth and become better in the future. The same thing applies
to our life experience that teach us not to be too arrogant so that we are not
blinded from what is the right thing to believe in life. As it was said earlier
that life is a never-ending life experience, our seeking about the truth itself
will never end.
So,
in the end of this writing we can grasp a new understanding about “What is it
means to be myself?”. We understand that being ourself means that we are being
honest about who we really are toward
other people as well as ourself. We are being honest that we have
principles that will lead our action and that principles will apply in any
circumtancess with no exception. We are also noble enough to acknowledge our
mistakes if we figure that some of our principles might not be right and from
that we learn to fix it in order to move forward in the future as a better
person.
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